So I get home from work tonight and see the light flashing on my answering machine. New message. It can’t be anything good or fun because it’s my home machine . . . blah. Mobile phone voicemails, now those are cool! Cool messages from cool people about cool stuff. But the home answering machine? That’s a drag waiting to happen.
Just as I suspected, the message was way creepy. It was from Washington Mutual bank, calling to inquire about a “suspicious transaction” placed on my debit Mastercard. Oh no, I thought. It must be all those kinky sex toys I bought online (JUST KIDDING!!!!!!!). Anyway, the message instructed me to call back right away because it was an “urgent” matter.
I called back and spoke to the WaMU bank representative. He asked me if I had placed an order of $4,000 to a construction equipment company in Utah. “A what?????“. Have you ever thought that something was both startling and hilarious at the same time? That was me at that moment. Unsettled that my bank card number had apparently been compromised, I was also laughing to myself that the transaction in question was for construction equipment. Read it again folks: construction equipment.
Yes, fraud has come to my doorstep. And the fraud detection system was really on the ball. It sensed right away that the spending patterns of a female artist’s model in New York City don’t generally include jackhammers, pile drivers, and backhoes. At least not four grand’s worth 😉
The nice bank guy on the phone said “I would cut that card up immediately Ms. Hajian”. So like an obedient girl, I took the scissors from my junk drawer and cut the bastard up. I’m a little creeped out! And to make matters worse, I now have a sudden, uncontrollable urge to drive a forklift.
Here’s a picture taken by Fred Hatt. It’s of me when I’m not sandblasting.